The well being of a family is usually dependent on income from both partners in a marriage relationship. That is one of the reasons people in a relationship tend to consider the employment status of the person they hope to get married to before taking a decision. Saturday Punch asked some people if they would marry a partner who is not employed.
What will he tell my parents?
Umeh Prisca
I cannot marry a man who is not employed. Where will he even get the money to pay my dowry and settle my parents? But if he is capable of settling my parents and doing some basic things, we can manage together. Also, if I’m employed and he’s not, I will marry him if I love him so much and he has prospect, but if I don’t have a job and he doesn’t, then I won’t marry him because that may lead to intense suffering. Really, I prefer that my man has a decent job.
There is no big deal in it
Juwon Ogunlade
As a matter of fact, I do not want my partner to be so career-oriented that she wouldn’t have time to take care of me and our kids. I have been a hustler right from time and it is my responsibility to provide for my family whether my wife is jobless or not. I do not need to depend on her income to live. So, there is no big deal in marrying an unemployed partner.
If he has focus
Ilongwo Chinonso
Well, I believe that if I’m destined to marry him, I will. If I am convinced that he has prospect and I’m able to judge from his words, attitude and appearance that he is good enough for me, why won’t I marry him? I know that it is a risky adventure, for economic reasons, but I also believe that it’s a risk that is worth taking. Even if I am not employed and he is from a good home, I will marry him because that might be a good indicator of a better tomorrow. No woman wants to marry a useless man and nobody wants to suffer. So, no matter what, he must have plan, focus and be determined. It’s not all about money; it’s more about love.
I will pay her salary
Ayo Eyemaro
I am usually angry when I hear questions like this. Some of my friends even make it an excuse not to get married on time. Why wouldn’t I? If she is unemployed today, that’s not the end of the world. Over time, the right job will come for her. As a man, I am even expected to pay my wife salary. I am working so that I can take good care of her. And if the right job doesn’t come her way, I will set her up in a business so she too can be employed. In short, I advise men not to wait till everything is fine before they settle down with their partners.
He shouldn’t think of marriage yet
Adesanmi Yemi
It’s funny. I cannot because there is no way he will be able to sustain the family. If you don’t have a job, you shouldn’t marry because how will you feed your wife, children and meet your financial obligations? If I marry him, will I be feeding him since he has no job? If he’s a graduate and if there is love, I can consider him because he has better prospects and we will continue praying. While waiting for office work, I will advise him to find something doing. If he refuses, he will start feeding himself and I will be on my own too. When hunger gets to his nerves, he will learn and find something to do.
If she is idle, I wouldn’t dare
Francis Foloki
Though I can marry a jobless partner, yet I can’t if she is idle. I think there is a difference between a woman being jobless and being idle. If she would agree to do something, no matter how little it is at the moment, I would marry her. Being unemployed at the moment does not mean she would remain so forever. But if it is about a woman being idle and not being able to think of what to do, then I wouldn’t dare.
It depends
Ogar Lyna
How do we survive in the marriage? That is very important. If he is a graduate who is still looking for a job and I could see that he has prospect, I can give it a try and if the waiting time is taking forever, I will advise him to look for a smaller one that is still dignifying till he gets a better one. But if he is not a graduate and does not have a job, then he has to look for someone else. If the wife continues to sustain the family, it can lead to fight, hatred, and inferiority complex. I want my man to be capable of fulfilling his obligations.
Love conquers challenges
Oluwaseyi Bello
With love and understanding, I would marry her. Just because she is unemployed at a point in time does not mean she would remain so. Have you not seen cases where an unemployed man marries a working class woman? It is just about understanding the present situation and knowing that tomorrow would be fine. So as for me, I would marry her, provided she is not a woman with an ego, though.
If he’s also desperate for change
Maduforo Amarachi
Yes I can marry a man who has no job only if he has prospects. Not having a job at the moment is a phase that will pass and if the guy has this mindset, it’s fine because this will enable him to keep making efforts till something desirable comes up. If he believes in himself, I will also believe in him and encourage him to keep trying because I know that someday, something favourable will come his way. If he appears carefree or nonchalant with his unemployed status, then, we can’t even date. His ideology, belief system and understanding about life are some of the things I will consider before I even agree to date him. Remember faith without work is dead.
Why wouldn’t I?
Kayode Idowu
Since I am working, I would marry her. Why would a man use the excuse of his partner not being employed at the moment to delay his marriage? I am not that kind of person that would say no to a woman I love because she is not working. So far my job is secure, we would go ahead with our plans and be together. Later, she too would get a job.
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